To Stay Married or Divorce
Discernment Counseling
Finding Clarity When You’re Torn Between Leaving and Staying
If you’re here, chances are you feel stuck — maybe even paralyzed — between two painful realities:
-
You’re leaning toward divorce but aren’t sure it’s the right step.
-
Your spouse is talking about leaving, and you’re desperate to save your marriage.
-
There’s been an affair, emotional disconnection, or too much hurt to know where to begin.
-
Or maybe, you’ve both tried therapy before and it only left you more confused.
You’re not alone and you don’t have to make a life-altering decision without clarity.
From Personal Experience to Professional Calling
Hi, I’m Yvette E. McDonald, and I understand firsthand what it feels like to be caught in marital limbo: emotionally, physically, and spiritually drained.
Over a decade ago, I found myself in a place of silence and uncertainty, trying to make sense of conflicting emotions, ethical dilemmas, and my family’s needs. My husband at the time was torn, one moment ready to repair our marriage, the next unsure of what he wanted.
We both lacked the discernment to see clearly through the pain. Looking back, I know that if Discernment Counseling had been available to us, it could have saved us years of emotional exhaustion and heartache.
That experience became part of why I now offer this process to couples who feel trapped between hope and heartbreak helping them slow down, breathe, and make intentional decisions instead of reactive ones.
Let's Take A Brief Timeout
Slowing down the moving train towards divorce and giving you both some time to reflect.
-
No more than 5 sessions to examine your options & figure out what path to take, let's divorce or working on the marriage in couples therapy
-
It's a way to see if the problems could be solved and if both want to work on them.
-
Gaining more clarity & confidence in your decision based on getting a perspective from a therapist who meets with both of you and hears from both of you.
What Is Discernment Counseling?
Discernment Counseling is a short-term, structured process designed for couples where:
-
One partner is leaning out and uncertain about the relationship.
-
The other is leaning in and eager to repair and reconnect.
It’s not marriage counseling. It’s a pause button, a space to gain clarity and confidence about your next step:
-
Path One: Maintain the status quo.
-
Path Two: Move toward separation or divorce.
-
Path Three: Commit to an intensive period of therapy focused on repair.
“The goal isn’t to solve your marital problems, but to see if they are solvable — and to make that decision with honesty, compassion, and clarity.”
How the Process Works
You’ll attend together, but the most important work happens one-on-one.
Each person receives private time to explore their perspective and emotional reality, while I hold space for both sides without judgment, blame, or pressure.
We focus on:
-
Understanding how your relationship reached this point.
-
Identifying each person’s contributions to the breakdown.
-
Exploring what would need to change for repair to be possible.
-
Creating clarity and peace regardless of the outcome.
Format & Length
-
Up to five sessions total
-
First session: 2 hours
-
Follow-up sessions: 90 minutes
-
Available in person or virtual
When Discernment Counseling Is Not a Fit
This approach is not suitable when:
-
One spouse has already made a final decision to divorce.
-
There’s ongoing domestic violence or coercion.
“Sometimes the most loving thing you can do for your marriage is to slow down before making a decision.”
Choose the statement below that best describes your situation.
3
Experience an increase in skills, improved relationships, decrease in adverse symptoms, reduction in strong emotions, supported emotional exploration, clarity and perspective and improved quality of life.
